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Wednesday, December 21, 2016

Happy Holidays from AmateurNikon - and a Funny Review

The staff of AmateurNikon (meaning just yours truly) will be away for a couple of weeks - I'll be coming back after New Year. Enjoy yourselves, take lots of pictures, and - above all - love one another, because we've got nothing else to keep away the darkness.
--

As something to put a smile on your face, today I'll offer you a very special review. It's a review for lens X. What's that? Oh, but it's the lens you never have with you when shooting with your Nikon!

General
This is the best lens Nikon (or anyone) has ever made. It's the lens that solves all your photographic problems. It's the fastest, sharpest, most reliable piece of equipment for all Nikon cameras. It's just the right size and weight, to boot. It has only one flaw: it's never with you. It's the lens you didn't buy, or the lens you forgot at home.



Pros/Cons
+ Sharpest lens ever made, period. It's gotta be, right? Right? Well, definitely sharper than the lens you're shooting with right now
+ The only thing faster that its autofocus is light; the only thing more reliable, a Japanese salaryman
+ Goldilocks on steroids: just small/light enough. Peee-erfect!



- It's rare. Very rare. Very, very rare
- In fact, it's so rare that it's never with you even when you own it
- Few people know how to use it properly, precisely because they never have




Intended Users
Great for:
  • People who like to nag and complain...
  • ... especially online
  • People enamored with technicalities instead of art



Not for:
  • People who like to make pictures instead of talking about specs
  • People who enjoy life and cherish their experiences
  • Pros - they can't afford to be picky. They'll use a tin can and cordon if they have to

Final Verdict

Obviously, it's tongue-in-cheek; but there's lot of truth in it, too. Stop worrying about lenses you don't own or didn't bring along, and use what you have. Chances are, even if you simply have an entry-level Nikon and a 18-xx kit lens, that's already far superior to anything used by the photographers who took some of the most iconic pictures in the history of photography.

And, as I said, the most important thing of it all: Enjoy the people around you.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! See you with a new article in 2017





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